Chicken of the Sea for Fish Amnesty Day

‘Fish are our friends, not food,’ claims PETA Spokescat, Chicken of the Sea…

Photo Credit: ©2011 Miss Moneypenny Satire

Every Fish Amnesty Day, the Chicken of the Sea flounders helplessly in PETA’s sea of delusion(1) trying to save the Sea Kittens from the hookers…

If PETA’s erotic Vegetarian crusade saves the Sea Kittens than who will save the Farm Kittens?

Photo Credit: Miss Moneypenny Photoshop Production

At PETA (Pheppings Evolved from The Apes) Labs, DNA (Doctors ‘N Alcohol) scientists cloned a new Farm Kitten using the Beaver hair of Nurse Amanda Hugankiss, the Broiled Breasts of Sheriff Boobarela Bytes, and the mind of Doc Eric A. Shoal to create the Beaver-ChickenCat who has fish feelings for seaweed tofu fish sticks.

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Footnotes:

(1) On Sept 27, 1997, PETA created national Fish Amnesty Day to counteract National Hunting and Fishing Day in order to convert vegetarians who continued to eat seafood.

After years of baiting fishermen with their unsuccessful “Fishing Hurts” Campaign, PETA created a new anti-fishing campaign that rebranded fish as Sea Kittens to target children and families in 2009.

Apparently, PETA wants children to believe that fish feel pain like their pet cats and dogs. “The pain system in fish is virtually the same as in birds and mammals.” -Dr. Donald Broom, professor of animal welfare, Cambridge University

PETA’s anti-fishing web-site claims fish feel pain yet, scientific research proves most fish do not have nervous receptors (nociceptors) for sensing and reporting pain to the central nervous system and the brain. Some fish species have nociceptive neurones similar to those found in humans, yet there is no evidence for the psychological experience of pain in these fish according to Dr. James Rose, professor of zoology and physiology at the University of Wyoming.

Furthermore, PETA’s program of fear-mongering about dangerous mercury levels in fish is untrue according to a report by the Center of Consumer Freedom. Minute traces of mercury in fish is inconsequential to human health and the health benefits of fish continue to outweigh any mercury paranoia being peddled by PETA. According to another study, “women who ate the most fish during their pregnancies had children with the highest IQs.” Reference source: Seafood Safety

PETA attacks fishing on Tucker Carlson

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Miss Moneypenny reporting for the Undercover Times