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The Stranger Tides of Speedy Seaman Staines

Ahoy, mateys… Will Lady Lewdinsky swallow seamen in th’ stranger tides o’ Speedy Seaman Staines?

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Photo Credit: Miss Moneypenny
Will Lady Lewdinsky’s doppelgänger save her from Speedy Seaman Staines?

-Master Bates: Yo-Ho, Ho me hearties, I drowned meself in a bottle o’ Rum t’ lustily clean out me Bum.

-Speedy Seaman Staines: Master Bates, Who be th’ Wench wi’ th’ Scurvy figure?

-Master Bates: Slap me with a fish… that be Lady Lewdinsky, me Lord.

-Lady Lewdinsky: Blow me down, Ye will ne'er drop ye anchor in me cove, Master Bates.

-Speedy Seaman Staines: Arrr, shi’er me timbers an’ batten down ye mizzenmast or I be cuttin’ off ye Peg-Leg, Master Bates.
-Speedy Seaman Staines: Avast Lady Lewdinsky, Drop yer sails an’ prepare t’ be boarded.

-Lady Lewdinsky: Ye scurrrvy varmint will ne’er hoist ye Fore-mast in me port or weigh ye anchor in me booty.

-Speedy Seaman Staines: I bade Lady Lewdinsky ‘good riddance’ an’ drowned meself in a pint o’ me special brew.

For Music Monday, Mermaid Melody

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Miss Moneypenny

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The Stranger Tides of Speedy Seaman Staines

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(4) In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, Photos of Monika Pietrasinska were modified for the Fair Use of comical commentary. We believe this constitutes a ‘fair use’ of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law.

The Stranger Tides of Speedy Seaman Staines is Titillating Tuesday and International Talk Like a Pirate Day humor by Miss Moneypenny aka Debbie Dolphin

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Miss Moneypenny reporting for the Undercover Times